Sometimes life is just plain hard. My heart hurts, my mind hurts and it just so hard to get things moving forward and molded into the vision you have. Personal life and business life. I feel like I have so much to offer and yet feel like such a failure. I will have been in business for 15 years September 3, 2018. I want this year to be an exciting year and a truly transforming year. But today it just seems too hard. I’m up at the studio trying to work, enjoy the window shoppers but yet tears keep filling my eyes. I am NOT one to cry anymore.
I have a passion for helping people succeed, in business and in life. Being a creative I struggle to find the right words when talking to people, which makes networking very hard. And just adds to my anxiety and fear of social events. It sucks. Yesterday started out great. Two of my friends filmed testimony’s for me since I have helped them find they’re ‘why’, which was so wonderful! My friend and co-worker Rachel found a client for me and he is going to go through my new branding system. Exciting, I know!
Then through other conversations, I decided to offer that same program to another person I had met and that conversation went okay, I just felt defeated after it. She didn’t seem too excited to meet and the conversation even made me feel like I was being pushy. Anyone that really knows me, knows that is one of my biggest fears of networking, seeming pushy.
As I reflect on the rest of the week I did have some really good networking events. I’m really excited about one of them and hope to be sponsored as a member later this year. I am working it, trying to fill the pipeline and transform the business. I am even speaking at a networking event next week. Have an awesome presentation put together and emailed off to the organizer.
Then today, in my fine art business, I found out I didn’t make it be a speaker at an event I was really hoping to speak at. Deflated again. Not to mention I get to the studio, excited for some quiet time and looking forward to getting work done, only to have my computer act up! Every program I tried to open either crashed or would just flash. That took two hours to get fixed and I honestly don’t know what was wrong. So much for getting some work done. I owe a few people some things and have a couple projects to finish before Monday, guess I will be working tomorrow too.
I read my horoscope and it was a great one, that deflated me more because I certainly was not how I was feeling. Being a small business owner is hard. It can be VERY rewarding but today it is really hard. I’m really stressed about my business, my weight, my little one, my big kid and only want to succeed at nurturing and caring for them, myself and my business. Failure is not an option.
I know that failure is part of the road today and I’m fine with these failures that I see today, but in the end, I will adjust and succeed. It’s the journey that counts. These failures are only lessons to improve and put my chin up. I’ll suck it up.
So tomorrow is a new day. I’ll focus on getting my action list together and move on. I may look strong and together on the outside but inside I’m nervous, scared and hopeful. I can do this. I will not stop. I am too passionate about helping businesses Craft their Brand and friends and clients Turn their Dreams into Art.
Thanks for listening.